What It Really Means to Say “Yes”

by | Jan 19, 2022 | Pleasure & Desire, Sexual Empowerment

In two different classes I taught this week, I observed the people I was working with avoiding saying “yes” to what they want in their own lives. And how we sometimes work against our own desires.

When life presents you with the next step, the next stage or thing, you can’t fight it, or you just fight against your own life. Your life reveals itself to you in every moment. Your sexuality reveals itself to you in every moment. Your sexual energy is alive in you and it’s guiding you towards your yes, or towards what you desire all the time.

When you do not listen and you fight your own deep desires, you get confused, sad, hopeless or feel small because you are fighting against your own well of energy and your guiding force. You get caught up in feelings of worthiness/unworthiness, angers and resentments, and not living to your full potential. I see people do this with their sexuality all the time.

Your desire is at work in you all the time…not just sexual desire, all desire. People often have guilt or mixed feelings about their desires. There is nothing bad or dirty about having desire. Desire gets you out of bed every day.  In fact, desire is so beautiful, it’s like your own internal GPS showing you the way to live fully in your power and how to express the gifts of your own magnificent life.

We learn to push desire away, to say “no” to it, to hold back. We learn to feel bad for having a desire, for wanting more. What if you just stopped feeling bad about your desire? What if you made the decision that when a strong desire wells up in you, that you’ll follow it and see where it leads you?

Your sexuality is your core energy. It’s the core of fire within you that burns to have experiences, to connect, to create, to bloom, to feel pleasure and joy. It wants ecstasy. If you say “no” to your own desire, you say “no” to your own ecstasy. Why would you do that?

When you get that tingle in your gut, that anchoring feeling that forms a line of gravity from the center of you to the center of the earth, that’s desire at work. It’s your energy getting into alignment with what you deeply want.

What are you saying “no” to right now that you really want? You might be saying “no” to connecting with your partner, to having more love, to loving yourself, to a sexy date, to feeling pleasure by punishing yourself and making yourself feel bad…you might be saying “no” to a relationship, or to freedom from a relationship that doesn’t serve you.

This week, take a look at your beautiful life and make a list of the things you are saying “no” to. Ask yourself how it’s serving you to say “no” to this aspect of your life? Would it add to your life to say “yes”? If so, then determine 1-3 steps you could take to say “yes” and step into what you want. And then of course, take the action.

I want more for you. Do YOU want more for you?

Then say “yes” to it.

A’magine is a pioneer in sexual empowerment and her extensive real-world experience sparkles throughout this book. This is a delightful journey toward better, richer, more fulfilling sex, for women who want more joyful, creative, pleasurable lives.


co-founder of Cuddle Party

Hi, I’m A’magine

I’ve been a Sexual Empowerment Educator
[&] Coach for over 25 years

I’ve helped thousands of people improve their lives, boost their confidence, learn the art of asking for what they want, step into their power, learn to radically love their bodies, show up as emotionally powerful in their relationships, rock-star their mid-life with the best sex ever, and put in perspective and practice the very real and important role sexuality was meant to play in their lives